Tiktok healed my inner teen
My 9-5 at Tiktok healed my inner teen which was something I never expected when I landed my dream job to work with one of the most popular social media platforms. I had impostor syndrome at first but it became place for me to grow and develop myself while unknowingly also give myself what teenage Jerli wanted.
During my soul searching travels (which again I never would’ve done if not for Tiktok), I would often have brunch alone after yoga and listen to the podcast “The Psychology of our 20’s” and the episode where she talks about healing your inner teen stuck out to me and how Tiktok played a roll in to that. Your inner teen are the attitudes and mechanisms you have developed during that period of your life and it mostly has to do with your mindset and experience at that time.
In my early teens, I had made vlogs of my life in the Philippines with the the video camera that my parents bought for the family and I post these on Facebook because I thought it was fun and didn’t think much of it. Fast forward to my leaving cert years, Irish girls in my year would laugh when I pass by and imitate Filipino words in a mocking way. I didn’t understand why they were doing it at first but I found out they spent the weekend going through my profile and watching my old videos. I removed those videos on Facebook to private when I got home.
Reflecting on the time I was with Tiktok before I became burnt out, there were moments that felt like a teenage version of me enjoyed the Tiktok culture so much. Working in Tiktok gave high school if it was a safe place vibes, where colleagues can come to work dressed as how they would like to express themselves without judgement. We could speak and chat in slang or Tiktok linggo and everyone would get it (well maybe older management struggled a little). We had 1:1 conversations outside work that allowed us to chat with our managers where we want our careers to go and how we could get there and lastly we enjoyed making Tiktoks, be it for team presentations, weekly highlights or personal use.
As a brand account executive, I was able to work with entrepreneurs, CEOs, marketing directors and social media agencies and part of my job and for the purpose of content strategy I would encourage and inspire them to share their authentic selves and values as a brand. I remember being on a video call with client and giving them my spiel on this content strategy and he asked me why I haven’t I done this myself. It was simple, the inner teen in me didn’t want to be judged or made fun of but I was glad he asked me this question because a part of me was tired of that fear while it has worked for businesses I have consulted with.
Tiktok became such a safe space for adult me and my inner teen. It has healed trauma of bullying for the girl who felt left out in secondary school and who only wanted to fit in and accepted by peers. It has helped me overcome some of the uncomfortable insecurities during my teenage years and has given me the opportunity to re-do some things again in a way my inner teen feels safe. For the inner teen in me that wanted to express myself and explore my own creative authenticity I feel more confident to do this now because how my adult me chose to approach it when it presented it self in my career. You might think this is subjective but this experience can also be universal for other who work in a 9-5 and I hope invokes your curiosity on how you could do the same for your inner teen.
